On Sunday we acknowledge the noble role of motherhood, which is easy. Mothers are the givers and guardians of life. They not only risk their own lives to create new ones, but nurture and care for their families — for generations — and selflessly address their own needs last. As a mother, I’ve realized so much of what we do isn’t because we’re the only ones able, nor because we actually want to. Rather we are often the only ones who anticipate problems and actually see what needs to be done.Mothers make the pediatric appointments, pick up the dry cleaning and put away the holiday decorations. It follows logically that mothers are also the most likely to take on difficult end-of-life responsibilities for their parents, spouses and other loved ones. And they do. Though we give the gift of birth and life, death and dying are also very much mothers’ issues. We are often the ones who make healthcare choices for those we love, when they no longer can.But our natural affinity is only part of the reason. The fact is, women live longer. On average, we live six years longer than men. And most states designate a dying patient’s spouse as the decision-maker in the absence of an appointed agent or proxy. Most married women outlive their spouses. The maternal tendency to take care of others means the last face each of us is likely to see as we die is a woman’s.
